Billion Dollar Couple Divorce: What about the Children?

16 01 2019

The 55yrs old billionaire and owner of Amazon, Jeff Bezos, is divorcing his wife of 25yrs and mother of his 3 sons and an adopted daughter from China.

He is now in a relationship with a twice divorced woman and mother of 3, 49yrs old Lauren Sanchez, whom he met through her husband. Sanchez herself is ditching her husband of many years for Jeff and his billions.

Social media is abuzz and experts are speculating breathlessly about how the billions will be split (137billion), and who gets what. Tabloids are spewing steamy headlines to make the most from the sordid affair. Yet, they skip the hard questions: what about the children?

Studies show that children are significantly affected by the parents’ divorce. The upheaval in their lives a serious and demands they be protected by the state.

Adult children of divorce are more likely than children raised in intact families to be fearful of intimacy, according to Judith Wallerstein. They are especially fearful of commitment, often remaining on the brink of marriage in cohabitation arrangements. Their thinking: “I don’t want to happen to me what happened to my parents.” If they do marry, they tend to fear and avoid having children. Their thinking: “I wouldn’t want to inflict on my kids what my parents inflicted on me.”

Most of them never saw their parents’ divorce coming. They remember that, as children, when they were enjoying themselves, their parents one day called them together and said, “We have something to tell you…” Now, as adults, when they are supposed to be enjoying themselves, they are waiting anxiously for the other shoe to drop.

By every measure of flourishing known to social science, children of divorce do noticeably poorer than children raised in intact families: higher incidence of school drop-out, drug use, sexual acting out and teen pregnancy, need for the mental health profession and for anti-depressants.

In a better world, the outcry and condemnation of this brazen disregard for the children’s welfare would have carried across the globe. As always the Catholic Church remains the sole voice of sanity in a deranged world, proclaiming boldly that divorce is immoral…because it introduces disorder into the family and into society. This disorder brings grave harm to the deserted spouse, to children traumatized by the separation of their parents and often torn between them, and because of its contagious effect which makes it truly a plague on society (CCC 2385).

One you-tuber commented, “Marriage is for suckers cucks and simps” and another wrote, “I’m not getting married until this freakshow stops!” While many scoff at women, calling them names like, witch, suckers and the likes. It is clear confirmation of the damage divorce does to the fabric of society and the psych of the youths.

In a world gone insane walking the cliff edge, marital vows are not worth the paper they are written on; promises are no longer meant to be kept; dishonor is honorable; serial polygamy is fashion. Truly, the words from W.B Yeats’ poem, the ‘Second Coming’ are prophetic for our world today, ‘Things fall apart, the centre cannot hold’. A sad prophesy of the future of our world, cut adrift from sense and reason, drifting aimlessly in uncharted waters of moral and marital relativism. Yet many call it progress.

But as St Josemaria, the founder of Opus Dei said, “I want you to think about how evil has prospered. All over this field of God, which is the world – Christ’s inheritance – there are weeds. Not just a few weeds: vast quantities of them! I want you to be aware of this, so that you may never be deceived by the myth of constant, irreversible progress. Understand what I mean: progress, when it is properly directed, is good, and God wants it. However, there is a kind of progress that blinds all sorts of people, who fail to see that in some areas mankind sometimes goes backwards and loses ground previously gained

Chinwuba Iyizoba





Secret to a Happy Relationship By Brian Clowes

4 09 2014

One recipe-for-a-happy-relationship

 Our Lord told us “… you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength” [Mark 12:30].

This means that, however unique each person is, everyone is comprised of four primary elements;

(1)  The physical element (the body);

(2)  The mental element (the mind, or intellect);

(3)  The emotional element (the heart); and

(4)  The spiritual element (the soul).

The key to a happy life – and a happy marriage – is lost on this world.  These days, most relationships between men and women start with the physical (having sex).  As the relationship continues, the man and woman may proceed to find out if they are mentally compatible.  Usually, they get no further than this.  They do not ever plumb the depths of the person – the emotional and the physical, upon which enduring relationships are based.  This is why about 80 percent of marriages between people who cohabit, or “shack up,” end in divorce.

By contrast, the Catholic Church knows the secret of living a long and happy life together.  If a young man and young woman find that they are compatible spiritually first, this is the foundation of a lasting relationship.  They then go on to find that they are compatible emotionally and mentally, and, finally, if they are in tune on these elements, they will find on their wedding night that they are indeed compatible physically.  In the United States, married couples who use natural family planning (NFP) and observe the teachings of the Catholic Church, have about a three percent to six percent divorce rate

Chastity in the Single StatePeople these days have many worries and stresses in their lives.  I tell young people especially to enjoy their youth, because there will be time enough for worry and cares later.

But young people now load themselves up with all manner of terrible stresses, and it is not supposed to be this way.  People before marriage should enjoy the greatest happiness of all – being free of a mind that is weighed down with worry.

A person who has sex before marriage may indeed enjoy its fleeting physical pleasure, but the Devil always extracts his price.  Such people will be oppressed with a large number of heavy thoughts and concerns;

  • “Unwanted” pregnancy and single motherhood;
  • Sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) and AIDS;
  • Loss of self-respect and good reputation;
  • Worrying about what their parents will think;
  • Buying and hiding contraceptives;
  • Contraception/abortifacient side effects;
  • Abortion and its physical and emotional impacts;
  • Raising children alone in poverty;
  • Difficulty in finding a good husband or wife; and
  • Fear of loss of their soul!

Free vs. Planned Parenthood Living

  • In Control of your life (standing on your own and living by your own values) vs. Being Controlled by Others (being influenced by peer pressure to have sex and use drugs, pervasive influence of the media, attempts to make you live by the values of others);
  • Trust in your parents and friends (who you know have your best interests at heart) vs. Lack of Trust (not knowing when someone wants to use or abuse you);
  • Called to Higher Things (service to God, nation and other people) vs. No Higher Vision (living just for the enjoyment of the present moment with no concern for others);
  • Natural Living (not deliberately polluting your body with powerful chemicals) vs. Medicated Living (using powerful birth control and anti-STD drugs);
  • Can Think (making decisions based on thought-out and solid values) vs. Pure Instinct (making decisions based on the moment, on what you feel like right then);
  • Deep Relationships (based on Faith, love and friendship) vs. “Hooking Up” (using each other and quickly moving on to someone else);
  • Freedom (living and loving by your own values) vs. Being a Slave or a Pet (living by everyone else’s values);
  • Human Being (living as if you have a soul) vs. Animal (living as if you do not have a soul).

The Great Paradox:  “None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free” [Johann Wolfgang von Goethe].

What Amuses Us?:  This is an age of entertainment, an age of distraction, an age of fevered activity.  The problem with all of these distractions, if we do not control them, is that they can lead to addiction — and further remove us from the Source of all true peace and contentment, Jesus Christ.

There are many things that amuse us, but only in a shallow and temporary way:  Drugs, sex, influence, possessions, the “New Age,” money, travel, fame, food, alcohol and power, among others.

We have learned through hard experience that only two things give us lasting contentment, happiness and joy:  Faith and family.  Yet so many people have given these things up for much more shallow pursuits.

Author


Brian Clowes








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